Bridal Accessories Gone Bananas

It’s apparently bridal fashion week (for Spring ’14? What the hell, fashion industry? It’s barely Spring ’13). I am also apparently a very poor member of my industry because I had no idea until about 30 minutes before writing this that that was the case. Whoops.

Anyway, bridal fashion week usually ends in me stomping about being surly about some trend I do not want to indulge people in and/or some I am peevish that will not make it far in places not a thriving metropolis. After one day, it appears we can expect more frothy lace, frothy lace sleeves, frothy lace peplums (note: I have yet to see an actual frothy lace peplum anywhere but the runway, but it’s only a matter of time now since I saw it at Marchesade la Renta, Carolina Herrera, Vera Wang AND Reem Acra. Seriously. Everyone but Temperley London’s had a lace peplum so far, and Temperley seemed to think they were costuming Downton Abbey.), and silly accessories.

I am not messing around when I say the accessories were silly.

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Newsflash: Stella McCartney Is Clearly Losing It

Before I get into the meaty goodness of this post (and there is some hot nonsense to talk about), I just want to talk a little about how I write these.  Usually the night before, I go hunting for my disaster of the day either online or in my inbox, since my posts go up at eight a.m. At eight a.m., I prefer to be doing other things, such as my personal favorite: sleeping.

Today, I woke up early just for this.

We’re on the tail end of the Fashion Week parade, which I will probably attempt to recap sometime this week. It’s the final few days in Paris, and bright and early this morning, my favorite designer in the world (to make fun of) showed her fall collection.

It did not disappoint.

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Denim On Denim On Denim AND Awkward Nudity?

That is the Rihanna Way.

She’s trying to sell the rest of us on the Rihanna Way, and I am side-eyeing her so hard for this one. Admittedly, she is making lots of headlines, but not all news is good news when some people, and by some people I mean the Daily Beast, are describing the collection as a “horror show.”

I also tried first to find this on style.com since they tend to be a bit more comprehensive than Vogue, and they didn’t have it. It took some work to find this mess, and by the second look I was not disappointed (since I was expecting a fully-fledged trainwreck).

It should probably go without saying given the title, but this may border on Not Safe For Work (or Life, really).

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The Grammy Awards: At Least There Isn’t Any Stella McCartney

Today’s problem lies not in lack of inspiration, but in overabundance. New York Fashion Week started on the 7th, the Grammy Awards AND the BAFTAs (British Academy Awards) were Sunday, and people were out in force dressed like complete morons. There are too many options before me.

But the Grammys tried to implement a dress code, and yet people still managed to dress really badly. The Grammys tried to tell the various celebrities and random musicians that they couldn’t indecently expose themselves, but god knows that can’t keep the Rihannas and such of the world down.

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This Coat Is Unbearable

I feel like you all should know that I agonized over the title for this post, since I have a love/hate relationship with puns.  I love them, but it is a truth universally acknowledged that they are all terrible.

Also, since we’ve done a lot of heavier, Fashiony posts lately, I feel it’s time to go back to the weird things otherwise normal people wear for a bit before I go back to shouting about whatever goes down the runways in New York, London, Milan and Paris.

Now, this time of year, there are parties and home functions. You might be having a super bowl party.  You might be preparing for an Oscar party, or  just having people over for scotch and snacks.  If people are coming over and it is not a themed party, it is the time to present yourself well.  For instance, N and I usually run about scouring the house and dress to impress, even if it’s just friends we’ve known for ages coming over.  If we ever have a housewarming party, it’s a guarantee that we (and the house) will be spotless.

Here is a man in a bear coat at a housewarming party.

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