Mish-moshed Trends? No, Thank You

Recently Dolce and Gabanna featured a lot of dresses and skirts with faces on them. This may have trickled down further, but since I am not Anna Wintour or whatever Meryl Streep’s character in The Devil Wears Prada’s character’s name was, I do not know where. But Dolce has prominently involved faces recently, particularly in the skirt department.

That’s all fine, although a bit awkward in the faces-on-skirts department. The bigger problem is that Audrey Tatou has combined faces-on-skirts or murals-on-skirts in this case with see-through lace and a bra.

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Leopard Print O.D.

If leopard print is like scotch, this is alcohol poisoning.

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Exhaustion Delay

Sometimes I look at what celebrities wear to go on talk shows, and I just think, “Really? You wore THAT?” or sometimes, “What is wrong with your stylist?”

This is one of those times. I get wearing what is basically a trend sandwich, but that is like filling a sandwich with truffle fries, foie gras, a deep fried mars bar, and queso. It may sound interesting, but it’s not going to taste very good.

This is what a trend sandwich looks like.

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I Don’t Want To Know About Gwyneth Paltrow’s Underwear

I also don’t want to know about her lack thereof.

I’d also be okay not knowing much about Gwyneth Paltrow, in part because I find her whole, “You too can have a body like mine after however many kids by following these easy at-home instructions! Hire a nanny, a personal trainer, and bathe every night in the blood of virgins and rub your skin with Himalayan were-pig butter!” Insufferable.

But I despite my dislike for her pretentious attitude, she generally does pretty well fashion-wise. I remember feeling like I was in crazytown last year watching the Oscars because she rocked the hell out of a cape, which is an absurd statement. But she looked kickass.

This is much less kickass.

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January Jones Seems Confused

Sometimes, bad looks come not in being over-dressed or under-dressed, but confusingly dressed. Sometimes, appropriateness is the problem, and sometimes combinations are the problem. This one is both of those, since January Jones apparently did not get the memo from the rest of her cast mates that they were dressing up for Mad Men at the Paley Center and decided to throw on some leather pants with whatever she wore down to the shops earlier.

I am, admittedly, not always one to talk here, since I am currently wearing a blazer over a t-shirt with the union flag over it. But I am also hiding out in the news room today, not going to a Mad Men party. If I was going to a Mad Men party, I would also be confused, but in different ways.

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