Happy Halloween!

Ah, Halloween.  The one night a year a girl can dress like a total slut and no one can sauy anything about it.

Thankfully, at the Halloween party I attended this year, no one was a “slutty” anything.  I may have pushed the line a tiny bit with the hemline on my skirt, but since I was wearing a calf-length coat, no one could really see it anyway.

Normally, tomorrow would be the big day to review Halloween costumes of the rich and famous, but Heidi Klum’s cancelled her traditional party thanks to Sandy.

So here are some of the ridiculous highlights from this past weekend:

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Acid Washed Monstrosity

First things first:

Because we live in a ridiculous world full of accidental comedy, yesterday’s January Jones jumpsuit mess was on Vogue’s Top Ten Best Dressed of the week.  I feel like a large, all-caps “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO” would sum up my feelings on the matter.

Vogue really does drop the ball sometimes.  In recent months, they’ve tried and failed to convince me that acid-washed jeans are somehow a good idea, as if everyone forgot that the eighties happened and were terrible.  I have not forgotten, and I refuse to participate.

Whenever Vogue has some really nutty idea for the “Real World,” they put it in some Social Shopper section that is usually somewhere between slightly and completely bonkers.  This week’s is called “Country Strong” or something stupid, and I think it involves flannel.  I never click unless it looks completely ridiculous.

But once it tried to imply that jean on jean was a good idea.

I present Real World proof that it is not.

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January Jones Wears A Printed Jumpsuit. Oh Dear.

Fashion is sometimes really ridiculous.

What isn’t ridiculous is the CFDA and the Vogue Fashion Fund.  Even though sometimes up and coming designers’ collections can look like something out of Zoolander, promoting new talent in an incredibly difficult field without turning it into a reality TV show is a great thing (even if I do love Project Runway). It’s a great means of promoting innovation in Fashion.  Of course, the CFDA is the same group of people who gave Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen an award for design, when most of their garments look like they’re twelve sizes too big and completely shapeless.

So  in many ways, it almost seems fitting that January Jones wears an ugly, very printed, very jumpsuity Rachel Zoe jumpsuit to some party hosted by the CFDA/Vogue Fashion Fund in LA.

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A Rant, And Then Some Leggings

Sometimes, in light of all the other things that are going on in the world, it can be hard to blog about fashion.  The election season has filled me with pretty much nonstop fury (particularly since I live in one of those coveted Battleground States.  Life was so much simpler when I lived in a Blue state and it didn’t matter if I voted or not, since Chicago would take care of it for me.).  Thanks to SuperPacs, political ads have reached the point of outright fallacy in the attempt to win votes.  Just think…only a year and a half ’til everyone starts talking 2016.

We’re surrounded by some of the most shameless attacks on women I’ve experienced in my lifetime.  Not a week goes by when some asshole says something mind-boggling like, “Some women rape easy.”  It makes me furious that we live in a time where men are so flagrantly willing to demean and debase half of the population.

But I’m going to write about how houndstooth leggings are stupid.

I mean, they are, but sometimes it feels trite.  I see a lot of really amazing bloggers (and you know who you are) talking about life and things that matter, and my most popular post has the highest hits because it accidentally has the same name as a pseudo porn site (Camel Toe City, proving that some people truly are sick.).  I love writing this blog, don’t get me wrong.  I can bitch about bad fashion for easily another several years and plan to.  But today, in light of all the discrimination, destruction, and death in the world, I wanted to at least say something about how those things do matter to me, and I don’t just sit about all day and screech about people wearing leggings.  I also screech about a lot of other things.

The leggings really are tragic, though.

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Bond Girl Does Not Actually Mean Trapeze Artist Or Figure Skater

It really says something when the afterparty dress is more demure than the premiere outfit.  I use the word outfit instead of dress quite deliberately, since Naomie Harris, who  is a beautiful woman at a snazzy Bond premiere where there would be loads of other Bond Girls, decided to wear a spangly leotard covered in a black shower curtain dress.

That is not the Bond Girl Way.

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